Wanted: The Not-Me Ghost

For crimes committed against the world. He is responsible for: all things gone awry, for any bad things that have ever happened, for constantly getting children in trouble, for the fall of Rome, and for the election of George Bush. He should be considered armed and dangerous, if seen please seek professional help or medication. He was last seen that time when you were 3 years old and tried to cut our own hair and ended up looking like Britney Spears, that time you were 8 and you got blamed for setting the cat’s tail on fire when you were actually trying to save poor fluffy, and that time when you were in middle school and got in trouble for touching the hot teacher’s butt; it was the Not-Me Ghost the whole time. He was even there that time when you were in high school and you got in trouble for smoking pot in the bathroom stall, because someone thought it’d be funny to pull the fire alarm and you ended up running through the school with your pants around your ankles. It was the Not-Me Ghost who pulled the alarm while you were dropping bombs, and you were scared and just forgot to pull up your pants… honest mistake really. So beware, the Not-Me Ghost is out there waiting, probably behind the wheel with a giant 40oz. of Colt 45.